Be Careful What You Wish For
by strawberries
Summary: The gang gathers at Kaiba's mansion, but arguments develop, and the Goddess of Chaos decides to have fun. Bakura has a body of his own, Ryou's evil, Seto's in love with Anzu, Jounouchi is Seto's dog, Malik's a girl, and Yami Yuugi is Pharaoh again!
1. Make a Wish!

Be Careful What You Wish For

Chapter One

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A/N: I suddenly had this idea and simply had to write about it or I'd never get any sleep again. XD I don't really read too many humor-type fanfics, so if someone has already written a YGO story like this, _please _tell me, so I can stop writing on this one. I don't want to steal anyone's idea. _Italicized_ conversations happen mentally between Yami Yuugi/Yuugi and Bakura/Ryou. (I'm going to refer to Yami Bakura as Bakura and Bakura Ryou as Ryou for this story.)

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"It was really nice of Kaiba to invite us to his mansion, wasn't it?" Yuugi commented to his yami, fingering the chain around his sennen puzzle.

"_Yes, it was. I wish I could remember my past life, but this party will be a nice break from trying to solve the puzzle of my past," _came the mental reply.

"Do you think everybody will come?" Anzu asked as she walked up the steps to Kaiba's house, the bright moonlight giving them sight. Honda shrugged.

"Well, _I'm _only coming for the food, not that jerk-off, Kaiba!" Jounouchi announced grudgingly. Everybody raised an eyebrow.

"He doesn't seem that bad to me," Shizuka commented quietly. Jounouchi turned a penetrating gaze on her.

"That's not funny, sis," he replied. Her mouth twisted into a frown.

"I can't wait to duel Kaiba again!" Yami Yuugi exclaimed, taking over his host's body in anticipation. He rubbed his hands together with an excited gleam in his eyes. Yuugi smiled from inside his soul room and shook his head.

After escorting the teenagers into a large sitting room, the butler left them silently. Otogi whistled under his breath.

"Look at this place," he said. Anzu rolled her eyes.

"Close your mouth before you swallow a fly," she said.

Only moments after he had left, the butler returned with two new guests in tow.

"Where's the food?" Ryou asked upon entering the sitting room.

"Hey, Ryou!" Yuugi exclaimed, taking over again.

"And Malik..." Jounouchi finished with the room falling into uncomfortable silence. Yuugi looked around before smiling.

"Where's Isis and Rishid?" he asked, breaking the tension.

"The museum," Malik answered curtly.

"Oh, joy, I see you all came," Seto observed sarcastically as he entered the sitting room. He crossed his arms over his chest. Mokuba stepped out from behind him.

"_You _invited us; don't sound so disappointed!" Anzu snapped.

"Mokuba invited you, woman, not me," Seto countered. Jounouchi's eyes narrowed.

"Don't get an attitude, Mr. Hotshot!"

Seto turned an icy blue gaze on the blond, and everybody gulped. "I'll get whatever kind of attitude I want. Mokuba invited all of you although I can only imagine why. So, it wouldn't bother me in the least if you left."

"Jerk," Anzu muttered.

"Quiet, little girl," Seto replied, waving her off like a servant. Anzu gasped angrily.

"I wish you would stop being mean to her!" Jounouchi yelled, balling his hands into fists.

"Well, _I _wish _you _would shut up and beg at my feet like the little mutt you are," Seto replied coolly.

"Woah, guys, cool it. Anzu can take it anyway," Malik said stepping between the two fueding boys. Anzu rolled her eyes.

"Oh, Anzu can take it. I'm the new Pharaoh! I rule the world! I decide who can take what! If you don't agree, I'll just mind-control you! Mwahahaha!" she mocked in an imitation of Malik's voice. "Let me decide for myself if I can take it!" She crossed her arms angrily. Her anger was truly directed at Seto, but Malik took the brunt of it.

"Don't put words into my mouth, weakling girl!" Malik yelled angrily.

"I'm not a weakling! I wish you could get a taste of being a weakling girl though since you think you can call others that!" Anzu retorted hotly.

Otogi, Honda, Shizuka, Yuugi, Mokuba, and Ryou silently watched Seto and Jounouchi arguing who were quickly joined by Anzu and Malik.

"I wish they would stop fighting," Yuugi whispered, shifting uncomfortably. Mokuba nodded, looking fretfully at his big brother.

"Fight, fight!" came an excited shout. Everyone turned to look at Yami Bakura who had taken over Ryou's body.

"Ack! That psycho guy!" Otogi exclaimed, moving to the side slowly. Bakura paid him no mind. Instead, he had turned to survey the sitting room they were all standing in. He was stuffing various golden ornaments in his pockets. He had picked up a golden dessert mint bowl and placed it on his head as he walked around the room.

"Quit stealing my stuff!" Seto yelled, abandoning Jounouchi to stomp over to Bakura. He snatched the bowl off of Bakura's head and tossed it behind him haphazardly.

"Ow!" Yuugi cried as it struck him in the nose. Yami Yuugi instantly took over.

"Look, here, Kaiba. Don't ever throw something at my aibou!"

Seto glared at Yami Yuugi. "It was an accident, but even if it wasn't, I can do whatever I please. This is my house!"

"Agh! Stop it, landlord!" Bakura yelled, clutching his head. Ryou hadn't fought him in a long time, but he had apparently made his host angry by stealing the High Priest's belongings.

"_Stop involving me in your insane schemes!"_ Ryou cried from his soul room, worried that he would lose his friends just as he had lost each one in the past.

"_I wish you would stop interfering and let me do what I want!" _Bakura replied mentally.

"_It's my body! I wish you would just get out!"_

"Alright, children, that's quite enough wishes for one night."

Everyone stopped bickering at the sound of the strong, yet feminine voice overhead.

"Who is that?" Seto asked of no one in particular. "Who's in my house?!"

"Oh, silly love, I'm not inyour house," the voice replied innocently.

"What's going on?" Shizuka whispered. Everyone stared at the ceiling though the owner of the voice was nowhere to be seen.

"I just couldn't help hearing your childish fighting and thought I could help," the voice offered, sounding suspiciously mischievous.

"Who are you?" Yami Yuugi asked.

"I'm Eris," she replied simply.

"Who is Eris?" Jounouchi whispered, his eyes darting around the room.

"There's a Greek goddess named Eris, the goddess of chaos and discord," Anzu replied, feeling a bit uneasy.

"There's no such people as gods and goddesses," Seto snapped, growing more and more frustrated.

"May Ra strike you down!" Malik exclaimed affronted.

"Let the mighty smiter smite me then!" Seto replied cynically.

"Ra has nothing to do with this," Eris interrupted. "He's vacationing in Morocco or somewhere. Normally, we Greeks would have nothing to do with _your_ lot, but the Egyptian chaos god seems to have a memory problem," she finished in irritation. Everyone turned to look at Seto.

"I am _not _Seth," he said firmly, glaring at everyone present.

"Of course not, dear," the mysterious lady said with amusement lacing her voice. "But as I was saying, let sweet ol' Eris help you out."

"I don't think I like the idea of a goddess of _chaos _helping us," Jounouchi said.

"When you wake up, all will be as you wanted," Eris told them with a laugh, leaving every teenager in the room to fall over unconscious.

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Honda and Otogi groaned as they both stirred simultaneously. Honda sat up shakily.

"I had the weirdest dream and I feel like hell," he mumbled, rubbing his head.

"I'm sueing whoever ran over me with a bus," Otogi replied just as painfully. He glanced over at a clock on the wall to see that it was now morning.

Beside them, a few more of the teens were stirring, each feeling equally as worn out. Ryou rubbed his eyes and looked beside him to see Bakura.

"I don't feel like talking to you," he told the spirit. "Go back to your soul room."

Bakura opened his eyes and looked up at him in shock. "I-I can't."

"Oh, my gosh. I can see both of you... at the same time!" Anzu exclaimed.

"What?" Ryou said, alarmed. He reached out to touch Bakura and was astounded to find that he could wrap his hand firmly around Bakura's wrist. The Egyptian spirit gasped and felt his body hurriedly.

"I have a body! My own body!"

"Thief!" Yami Yuugi yelled, jumping to his feet and pointing an accusing finger at Bakura. He turned around.

"What of it, Pharaoh?" he asked snidely.

"You don't deny it! You shall be mummified alive!" Yami Yuugi told him before launching himself at the unsuspecting Bakura.

"What the?! Get off of me!" Bakura forced out, wrestling the spirit above him.

"Get off, stupid spirit!" Ryou yelled, trying to pry Yami Yuugi off of Bakura. Everyone's eyes widened at the insult directed at Yami Yuugi from sweet Ryou.

"I can take care of myself, shrimp," Bakura retorted, glaring at Ryou. Ryou hmph'd and backed away.

"_I... he won't let me out!"_ Yuugi said from his soul room, frighteningly astounded at the realization.

"Ahh! A voice in my head! There's someone in my head!" Yami Yuugi said, grabbing his head and looking around the room. Bakura jumped to his feet and wasted no time in running out of the sitting room and completely out of Seto's house.

"Come back!" Ryou called after him, but to no avail.

"Get out of my head, demon! Oh, Ra!" Yami Yuugi cried before he, too, ran out of the house.

"Oh, my... what is going on?!" Anzu whimpered, shaking Shizuka and Mokuba awake next to her. Helpless to know what was happening, everyone remained silent, looking at each other for answers.

Within a minute, everyone slowly turned towards the sound of persistent slurping. Jounouchi was down on his hands and knees next to Seto and was licking him repeatedly in the face.

"Oh, wow," Otogi said with a grin tugging at his lips. Seto stirred next to Jounouchi and sat up, rubbing his head. To everyone's astonishment, Jounouchi barked happily and pounced on Seto's chest, proceeding to lick him again.

"Ugh! Mutt, get off of me!" Seto yelled, shoving Jounouchi away. "I've never felt so dirty in my entire life!" He spat to the side of him and wiped his face hastily. Seto's cold, blue eyes quickly darted to the side of the room where everyone, except Malik who was still unconscious, was standing, staring at Jounouchi wide-eyed. Seto's cold stare melted instantly.

"Oh, the love of my life! Your angelic beauty is beyond compare! The vibrant spring roses envy your lovely face!" he exclaimed while rushing over and dropping on one knee in front of Anzu. He gripped her hand and pleaded with her to marry him.

Honda, Otogi, and Ryou burst into laughter although Ryou's laughter sounded suspiciously malicious.

"Seto!" Mokuba cried in shock, covering his mouth with a hand while trying to make Jounouchi stop humping his brother's leg with the other hand.

"Kaiba! What is with you?" Anzu asked in an annoyed manner, yanking her hand out of his grasp.

"Please, make me the happiest man alive!" Seto begged, shaking his leg violently, trying to rid himself of Jounouchi.

"No, I won't marry you! Jounouchi, stop!" Anzu ordered, backing away from Seto and his persistent blond 'pet.'

Ryou sauntered over to Malik and kicked him in the side. The Egyptian groaned and turned over onto his back, squinching his eyes together in discomfort. Ryou stared down at him in surprise.

"This is rich," he murmured with a sinister gleam in his eyes. He reached down and yanked Malik to his feet.

"Malik..." Honda choked out, interrupting Seto, Anzu, and Jounouchi. He pointed at the pair across the room.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?" Malik asked, leaning back a bit and eying everyone curiously. He felt his throat. "What's wrong with my voice?"

"You're a... a..." Mokuba trailed off, wide-eyed.

"I'm a what, brat?" Malik snapped, clearing his throat. "Who changed my clothes? This shirt is tight," he said as he pulled his normal purple top over his head and threw it to the side. He glanced over at it, and his confusion was obvious.

"That _was _my shirt..." he trailed off in growing confusion. He noticed Otogi and Honda were staring at him with their mouths agape, and Ryou was grinning like a maniac next to him. He put his hands on his hips.

"What is going on here?!" he demanded. "And why is my voice so high?!" He stamped his foot and turned towards Ryou. The ivory-haired teenager caught his gaze and slowly trailed it down to Malik's chest. The Egyptian followed Ryou's gaze and screamed as his violet eyes met two very generously-sized breasts. He pulled his loose jeans away from his waist and frantically looked down. He screamed again and promptly fainted.

"Oh, my gosh. Malik is a girl!" Mokuba exclaimed in shock.

"I think I'm going to faint, too," Shizuka said, steadying herself against Honda. Suddenly, Jounouchi barked again and jumped into Seto's arms.

Otogi stared around the room speechlessly. Female Malik was shirtless and unconscious on the floor. Bakura, in a body of his own, and an insane Yami Yuugi had hauled it out of the house with poor Yuugi trapped inside his own body. Honda was supporting Shizuka next to him, the two of them seemingly normal; Otogi knew he felt normal, too. Ryou was grinning evilly in a corner of the room, looking very much like Bakura. Seto was showering Anzu's hand with kisses with Mokuba trying to get Jounouchi off of his brother's leg.

"Is this a dream?" Otogi wondered aloud.

"No, I think it's a nightmare," Honda said.

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So... should I continue on this? Be honest now! XD I'm currently writing another fic, so this one would probably only be updated once a month or so if I do continue it. Please review and tell me what you think.


	2. Find the Runaways!

Be Careful What You Wish For

Chapter Two

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A/N: Thanks for reviewing! I'll continue on this. Also, yes, Eris is the villain in the Disney movie Sinbad, but she really _is _the Greek Goddess of Chaos and Discord. XD

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Amidst the silence cloaking Seto's sitting room, Ryou prodded Malik with his foot. The blonde female began to stir. Suddenly, his eyes flew open and he looked up at Ryou. Relief was visible in his violet eyes.

"Oh, thank Ra. I had the most horrible dream that I had breasts!" Malik exclaimed.

"Yes, they are quite generous in proportion," Ryou remarked casually.

Malik's hands flew to his chest, and he groped himself. "Oh, Ra! I'm a woman! I'm a helpless, weak woman!" He scrambled for his shirt and threw it on quickly.

Anzu glared at him from across the small room. Malik leapt to his feet and looked as if he was going to make a mad dash out of the room, but Ryou slammed a hand down on his shoulder and shook his head.

"No more runaways. We need to figure out what's going on," he scolded with a frown. Malik looked around suspiciously.

"Where's the Pharaoh?"

Ryou shrugged. "He _should _be checking himself into an insane asylum, but he's probably wandering around trying to get the 'voice' out of his head."

Malik blinked. "_What?_"

Ryou waved him off. "Never mind."

Looking like he could kill someone, anyone, Malik glanced frantically around the room. "I'm going to keep thinking this is a horrible dream, but in the meantime, somebody tell me why the hell I'm a woman."

Everyone appeared helpless to answer his question. "We don't know," Anzu said quietly. "All of a sudden, you're a woman--although at least you can say you're cute; Yami Yuugi has gone crazy and he ran off, screaming something about 'voices'; Yami Bakura has also run off in a body of his _own_, God help us all; Jounouchi thinks he is Kaiba's dog; Kaiba thinks he is in love with me."

As she finished, feelings of overwhelm came over each teenager present. However, Jounouchi and Seto were quickly out of their stupor. After all, Jounouchi had Seto's leg to hump, and Seto had Anzu to hump... hopefully, if everything went according to his plans.

"But I _am _in love with you, ma cherie!" he told Anzu dramatically. She wrenched her hand from his grasp.

"No, you're not!" she replied hotly.

He seemed to be hurt by her words, but was quickly angered when Jounouchi began rubbing up against his legs. "Stupid mutt!" he shouted. "Get away from me!"

"I wonder what my yami is doing," Ryou pondered with a sinister gleam in his chocolate eyes. Honda raised a brow.

"You're acting strange, man."

Ryou looked sharply at him with narrowed eyes, but said nothing.

"Who cares about Ryou? Look at me, look at me!" Malik screamed, stamping his foot. "I've got _tits_, you bastards! And I'm missing something rather important downstairs!"

Anzu couldn't help but giggle at his outburst. Malik turned bright lavender eyes on the other female.

"You!" he shrieked, pointing a finger at Anzu. "This is all your fault! That Greek bitch gave us what we 'wanted,' and you wanted me to have a taste at womanly weakness!" With that, Malik launched himself at Anzu, tackling them both to the ground.

"Ma cherie!" Seto cried, trying to pry Anzu and Malik away from each other. Jounouchi jumped into the fray, pulling at Seto's pantleg whilst barking incessantly.

"Do something!" Shizuka cried. Honda and Otogi each grabbed one of the fighting women albeit reluctantly since they were privately enjoying the catfight.

"Let me at that bitch!" Malik screamed, clawing at Otogi's arms. If he weren't trying to control the hellcat in his arms, Otogi would have been rolling on the ground laughing.

Eventually, everyone settled down and an uncomfortable silence fell over the room--with the exception of Jounouchi's panting, of course.

"Malik made a very good point," Honda spoke up. "Eris _did _say she was going to give us what we wanted. What did we all say we wanted?"

Everyone was silent as they thought about what they had said prior to Eris's appearance.

"Well, I said that Malik should have a taste of female weakness," Anzu supplied, glancing at the Egyptian man-turned-woman.

"But you _didn't _say that I should_be _a woman!" Malik yelled back angrily. Otogi tightened his hold on Malik, just in case.

"Jounouchi wished Kaiba would stop being mean to Anzu," Honda recalled. Then he tilted his head in confusion. "But he didn't say Kaiba should fall in love with her."

"Oh, yeah, and then Kaiba said my brother should beg at his feet like a mutt or something," Shizuka said, pursing her lips together in disapproval.

"Well, I think it was taken to the extreme!" Seto exclaimed, then amended to Anzu, "Except in your case, angel." He growled. "Damnit, mutt, get off of me!" He started hopping around the room, frantically trying to get Jounouchi to leave him alone.

"I told my yami that I wish he'd get out of my body and leave me out of his plans," Ryou said boredly.

"Is that all, guys?" Honda asked, looking around. They all nodded. Ryou deliberately left off the part about Yami Bakura wishing Ryou would stop interfering with his plans.

"Well, what happened to Yuugi then?" Mokuba asked in confusion. Everyone shrugged.

"Maybe Yuugi or the other Yuugi made a wish," Otogi suggested. "We've got to find Yuugi and Bakura."

"Especially Bakura," everyone added, looking at each other uneasily.

"I'll find my yami," Ryou offered helpfully with an obviously false smile. Everyone appeared hesitant, noticing the change in their friend.

"Well... okay," Anzu conceded. "Malik and Kaiba, go with Ryou."

"Oh, fine, ditch me just because I'm prettier than you!" Malik replied cynically. Anzu rolled her eyes as the blonde stomped over to Ryou and crossed her arms over her chest, growing even angrier when her breasts were in the way.

"And I'm not leaving your side, my love!" Seto replied forcefully.

"Fine, I'll go with Ryou and Malik, and you all find Yuugi," Otogi told them. "Come right back here after you find him. We have to figure out what to do about these wishes."

Everyone nodded in agreement and left Seto's house in search of the two boys.

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_What the hell was wrong with the Pharaoh?!_ Bakura wondered furiously as he wandered down an alleyway with his hands shoved in his pockets. _Ryou? _he questioned experimentally. _Can you hear me?_

He didn't know whether to feel excited or nervous without his host. He didn't have a clue how he suddenly had a body of his own, but it felt great to be out by himself. He didn't have to listen to the weakling reprimand him for his actions or listen to him yell when Bakura endangered the Pharaoh and his stupid little friends.

On the other hand, he didn't quite know how to act without Ryou there. What if he needed to call one of those taxi-things? Bakura attemped a whistle in the same way he had seen Ryou do it; he was not too frustrated when only air came out of his mouth. He shrugged.

He had gotten by on his own before, and he would do it again. He didn't have anyone to answer to--not that he had paid any attention to Ryou's ranting before--and he would enjoy his freedom starting right now; who knew when it would end.

A sly smirk spread across his face as he picked up his speed down the alleyway. _World domination, here I come!_

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"Sneaky demon! Begone from my head!" Yami Yuugi bellowed, looking around wildly. Numerous people on the streets stopped to stare as he stormed past them.

"_Let me out! What's wrong with you?_" Yuugi cried from his soul room.

"What's wrong with me? I'm talking to myself in my head, that's what is wrong!" the ancient Pharaoh answered.

Yami Yuugi jumped backward as another car flew past him. "Metal demons!" he shouted in astonishment. He spotted a parked car and wandered up to it hesitantly. "Yet how are they so fast?"

He poked at the parked car with the toe of his boot. "This one is a deep sleeper," he observed, circling it like a vulture.

"_It's an automobile,_" Yuugi told him as if he should know this already.

"Oh, Ra!" Yami Yuugi shrieked, clutching at his head. He glared at the car as if it were the fault of the voice being heard once again. He backed away from it, nearly getting run over by another car in the process, and ran into the nearest building.

"Hello, can I help you find anything?" a salesclerk asked. Yami Yuugi merely shook his head and waved the lady off like a servant.

He explored the department store, shoving various sharp kitchen utensils in his belts. "These should come in handy for that traitorous thief."

Upon reaching the ladies' lingerie department, he yanked a navy blue bathrobe off of its hanger. _Hmm, this should do,_ he thought. He pulled a steak knife out of his belt and proceeded to cut the sleeves off of the bathrobe. Once he was satisfied, he draped the sleeveless bathrobe over his shoulders like a cape.

He walked proudly towards the front of the store and to the doors. "Hey, you need to pay for those!" a salesclerk called after him. Yami Yuugi looked appalled at the mere suggestion of such a thing.

"The Pharaoh does not _pay _for things!" he replied in astonishment. When the salesclerk called for security, he quickly ran out of the store.

"_That's stealing!_" Yuugi exclaimed incredulously.

"By Ra's will, I must do something about the demon making a nest out of my head!" Yami Yuugi declared. "An exorcist! Yes, I must find an exorcist!"

Yuugi gulped in his soul room. _That can't be good..._

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Hmm, Bakura's _really_ bent on world domination now! Yami Yuugi is going to have Yuugi exorcised?! Yipes... Stay tuned for the next chapter of BCWYWF to see if the gang has any luck of finding the runaway yamis.


	3. Pants, Criminal, Hot Cocoa, Exercise!

Be Careful What You Wish For

Chapter Three

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A/N: I had some major writer's block on this! Wah. ;;

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"Ugh, I'm tired! We've been searching for hours!" Malik complained. Otogi looked equally tired next to him.

"He has to be around here somewhere," Ryou said, looking down each alleyway they passed. It had to be close to midnight, but Ryou wanted to find his yami.

"I swear to Ra, someone is going to pay for all of this," Malik threatened. He glared up at the sky and screamed, "Eris, you bitch! I hope you choke on some peanuts!"

"I've got a few peanuts you can choke on, sweetheart," came a sleezy voice. Malik stopped dead in his tracks and whirled around.

"Excuse me?" he hissed, his eyes narrowed dangerously. The fat, drunken man licked his lips in what he assumed to be an enticing manner. Malik clenched his hands into fists.

"What I would do for the rod right now," he said lowly.

"I've got one of those too, baby," the man catcalled. A vein pulsated in Malik's forehead.

Without a word, Ryou took the sennen ring off of his neck. "I can turn him into an inanimate object for you if you want."

"Hey!" Malik cried angrily. "You're supposed to give that to the Pharaoh!"

"It's mine, and I'm keeping it," Ryou responded defensively. Otogi's eyes were wide with apprehension.

"What are you doing, Ryou? You're not going to use that magic necklace thing, are you?" he asked fearfully. Malik and Ryou ignored him.

"Well, fine, if you're going to keep it, you might as well make a use for it," Malik remarked. The drunken man was staring at the three teenagers strangely.

"I think you could use some clothes that fit better," Ryou suggested, looking pointedly at Malik's pants which were threatening to fall down now that his waist was much curvier. Without warning, the ring glowed and before he knew what was going on, the lecher had taken the form of a lady's black slack pants. Malik picked them up off the ground and eyed them speculatively.

"Well... I guess they'll have to do," he said, walking behind a dumpster to change.

Otogi's mouth was agape in astonishment. "Ryou, how could you?! I'm telling the others the second we get back!"

The ivory-haired boy merely shrugged in response. "Go ahead."

Otogi found himself standing alone in the middle of the street as Malik and Ryou strode away confidently. "I can't believe those two!" he cried incredulously. About-facing, he stomped back in the direction of Kaiba's mansion.

Malik glanced at Ryou out of the corner of his eye. "Who are you, and what did you do with the other Ryou?"

Ryou chuckled darkly. "Let's find my yami. We could all have some fun."

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"Gah, I can't believe we haven't been able to find Yuugi yet. I wonder where he is?" Honda mused.

"I hope he's okay. What if someone did something to him? He didn't seem exactly stable..." Anzu trailed off. Seto grasped her hand tightly.

"Do not fear, ma cherie. If evil lurks about, I will protect you!" he declared. Mokuba sighed next to him, and Anzu snatched her hand away with a glare.

The group of six continued down the streets, knowing that it was quite late. They needed to return to Kaiba's mansion at some point in time; afterall, they had school the next day. Shizuka stopped when she heard howling coming from behind. Looking around, she asked, "What's that?"

Honda glanced at her and shrugged. "It sounds like a... dog..." Anzu slapped a hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter. Jounouchi was sitting back on his haunches, howling at the moon. Honda walked over to his friend and patted him on the head.

"It's okay, Fido. Come on, boy!" he beckoned with a whistle. Anzu glared at him.

"That's not nice!"

Honda only laughed and shrugged innocently.

"Come on, let's keep looking," Mokuba suggested.

As they travelled down the streets, most of the stores and shops were already closed for the night. However, they passed a department store which was still open. They stopped to see what was going on when they noticed a few police cars parked outside of its door. The policemen were questioning a few employees of the store.

Looking uneasily at each other, everyone guessed, "Bakura."

They wandered up as closely as possible to hear the conversations between the police and the employees.

"Yeah, and porcupine boy had a bathrobe around his shoulders and a ton of knives in his belt! Didn't even pay for them!" one of the girls cried. One of the policemen reported into his intercom that the suspect was 'armed and dangerous.'

"Porcupine boy?" the other policeman questioned skeptically. "Can you descibe his appearance better?"

She nodded eagerly. "Oh yes, officer. He had black hair sticking out in every direction and blond streaks in his hair, like some punk rocker druggie kid."

Anzu and everyone gulped nervously. She turned to face her friends, shoving Seto away in the process. "We really need to find Yuugi. He's going to get arrested if a policeman sees him!"

"Dang, I can't believe Yuugi's a wanted criminal now!" Honda exclaimed in shock. Everyone nodded somberly before setting off to continue looking for the ancient Pharaoh.

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Bakura nodded in approval as he flipped through a magazine listing buildings for sale. If he were to properly and thoroughly take over the world, he would need a satisfactory headquarters. It had to be in a quiet area of town. It could not be easily noticeable--a problem he was having a hard time overcoming with the listed buildings--since he may need to flee those 'policemen' every now and then.

Thumbing a page, he read the description of one of the buildings a third time. It had been tossed from owner to owner with it quickly being put up for sale each time; it was hard to keep a business open because it was in a sparse part of town and resembled a warehouse instead of a business locale. It sounded ideal.

"Need anything else, hun?" an elderly waitress asked as she approached Bakura's table. He glared at her.

"Woman, you interrupt my search for my world domination headquarters continuously! Begone!" he replied harshly with a flick of his hand. "Oh, and bring me more of that delicious hot cocoa."

"Sure, hun," the woman responded with a cheeky, clueless smile.

"Old bat," he muttered after she had gone. "I'd slice out my organs and litter them across the desert before I become..." Shudder. "old."

He had found the perfect location for his headquarters, but how would he get it? He wasn't an expert at present-day money, but he knew the figure with many zeros was a lot more than he had. He scowled. He couldn't even turn random objects into money since Ryou had his ring. For the first time in three thousand years, he wished he had his prison of a ring.

Sipping his hot cocoa, he racked his brain for an answer to his dilemma. Who was rich enough to rob to receive this sizeable amount?

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"Are there not any soothsayers in this village? One would certainly think there would be, what with all the metal demons running loose!" Yuugi ranted as he pulled his makeshift cape closer to his shoulders to block out the cold. The sun was quickly slipping down to hide in the horizon until the next morning, and the chilled breeze prickled the Pharaoh's skin.

The sound of music and chanting caught the Pharaoh's ears. He spun around in a circle, listening for the origin.

"And a one, two, three! And a left, up, down!" the woman chanted repeatedly.

_Please... what's wrong with you?_ Yuugi pleaded inside his soul room. The Pharaoh let out a yelp of horror.

"Exorcist! Exorcist!" Yuugi shouted, running into the building with the words THE EXERCISE HOUSE on its sign. He skidded to a halt as he spied about a dozen women doing a strange exorcism dance, still chanting their counting. He was apalled by the choice of clothing soothsayers of this village wore; had they no modesty? Their breasts and bottoms bounced with their jumping, and he looked away with a blush.

"I need to exorcise a demon!" he called out, pulling his cape over the knives in his belts. One of the women, presumably the head soothsayer, came up to him enthusiastically.

"That's right, sweetie! Fat is a demon, and you just need to exercise, exercise, exercise!" the perky blonde exclaimed, tugging him over to where the other ladies were still doing their strange exorcism dance. He stared at her dumbfoundedly.

"What? Fat? Is that its name?" he inquired skeptically.

"Honey, we're going to work past your denial and get you into shape!" she replied. She regarded him for a moment. "Though I really don't think you're out of shape to begin with."

Yuugi stared aghast. "What?" he hissed. "I am most certainly in the godliest of shape. What in Ra's name are you even talking about? I need an exorcist to rid me of the demon in my head!"

The lady tilted her head. "Sweetie, this is an aerobics gym for ex_er_cising, not ex_or_cising!"

Yuugi jumped back as if he had been bitten. His eyes were round with apprehension. Without a word, he whirled around and ran out of the building. The aerobics instructor stared after him. "Strange boy." With a shrug and a giggle, she turned around to begin her exercise counting once more.

The Pharaoh pulled at his hair as he stood in an alleyway. It was getting colder and colder as the night wore on. He was housing a persistant demon, and he had no idea where his palace was. How did I even get here, he wondered. In his soul room, Yuugi decided not to answer him for fear of upsetting the Pharaoh even more.

"I shall need to find somewhere to rest for the night," Yuugi mused to himself. "Tomorrow begins my new hunt for another exorcist!" With renewed hope, he set off in search of somewhere to sleep.

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I cannot say when the next chapter of this will be posted. I'm on a role with my other fic Target: You, so that is my top priority. But I will try to post a chapter on this as soon as possible. Please review in the meantime!


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